I recently friended The Art of Non-Conformity on Facebook. I have friended phrases before but never one with such a hipster name. I have high hopes for our budding relationship. Anyway, my new phrasey friend is giving away a journal. I recently finished a journal. To win the journal, one must comment at The Art of Non-Conformity’s website and impress the judges and their cats(?) with a pithy entry. I just wanted to submit a photo of my now-complete journal to substantiate my dire need. Not possible. I can only enter a comment and a link to my website. Thus, I am posting a picture of the journal here in hopes that the judges are incredibly bored and decide to play an office game to uncover the most inane blog entry ever which they will post on the wall with the inspirational message: “This old lady thought this was a SCREAM when she hit publish.”
If you want to decrease my chances of winning, go comment at https://www.facebook.com/artofnonconformity. If you want to know why my journal ends with a weird sketch of the Eiffel Tower, comment below. Lily, with Minnie’s help, will determine the best entry and I will send you this original piece of artwork with a brief description of my obsessive interest in this iconic symbol. (Yes, my blog has funky contests with prizes now, too). If you want to know what the mysterious jot in the top left hand corner is, sorry. I have lots of secret code in my journal standing in for the things in my life which cannot be explicitly described.
Also this post really brings to mind a piece of great blogging advice from www.bumfuzzle.com which is also a great example of using the “exasperated sarcasm” tone-of-voice to get your point across while simultaneously bashing a media darling.
“#2 Sponsors – Quit Being a Shill. Just because a company gives you a discount on their product, or even gives it to you for free, does not make them a sponsor, it makes them an advertiser. Conceivably your trip around the world will cost you anywhere from $50,000 to $100,000 and up. So that $200 worth of product equates to maybe two-tenths of one-percent of your overall trip budget. For that you are going to pimp that product for four or five years?
GoPro cameras are famous for this. Every other cruising blog out there these days is “sponsored” by GoPro. A GoPro camera probably costs the company $20 to produce. If your blog manages just a hundred hits a day for four years they’ll have paid you .14 per one thousand page views. The ever lame Google ads will get you forty times that number. Hell, GoPro even gives away one of every item they make, every day! And on their website there is not one mention of a single cruiser. You, my friend, are a shill.”
HA HA HA. Now I don’t feel bad that GoPro hasn’t sent me a free camara. GoPro, send me a free camara and I will tattoo your name on my butt (with a sharpie) and post it on my blog which has two DEVOTED readers.
OK, for the cat:
Yesterday I was wasting time on Pintrest and saw a dog holding a sign that read “I EAT MY OWN POOP.” I was going to post it here so I went back to pinterest and, in the SEARCH field, I entered the words “I EAT MY OWN POOP.” It pulled up about thirty pictures of dogs, one bird and one rodent all of whom want the world to know that THEY EAT THEIR OWN POOP. There is not one cat featured. Go to Pintrest and try it.